becoming parents

Things I say about our baby to be:

—Are you hungry? What should we eat?
—Even his kicks are perfect.
—I'm going to hang out with my little buddy all the time.
—I don't want him to move out of the house. How can I convince him that it's cool to live with your parents forever?
—He says he doesn't like the curry.

Things Simon says about our unborn child:

—Give the man some meat! He wants meat!
—I feel so bad for him in there. He must be so uncomfortable. The man needs space.
—Are his heavy muscles weighing you down? He needs to flex.
—He's such a champion.
—I can't wait to meet this dude and see what he's all about.
—I just think this is the kind of seat a man his age should be sitting in. (regarding a leather baby chair)

Simon: He's turning into a man.
Julie: He's turning into a baby.
Simon: Yeah, but this is the beginning of his manhood.
Julie: Boyhood.
Simon: Mmm.
Julie: Mmm.